Flash Fridays – June 5th

For this weeks Flash! Friday we had to incorporate a farmer into a story about the following prompt:

Inspection. CC2.0 photo by Brian (Ziggy) Lilioia.Inspection. CC2.0 photo by Brian (Ziggy) Liloia.

Free Range

Farmer Jones watched the cloud of dust approach. He knew the van would be stuffed full of bureaucrats. He didn’t bother with foreplay.

“You’re trespassing!”
A voice shouted back, “We have a warrant to perform an inspection.”
“And I have a shotgun.”

A man appeared with his hands in the air, “Mr. Jones, this is a serious matter. If you won’t let my team perform their duties I’ll be forced to restrain you.”

Jones raised his weapon, but found it increasingly hard to do so. It became heavier and heavier, until it fell to the ground with a thump. He narrowed his eyes, “Bloody wizards! What do you want?”
“We’ve had reports about mistreatment at your Fairy farm.”

Jones tried to control the panic in his voice, “I can explain. They just weren’t producing dust like they used to. I didn’t think a few steroids would hurt. How was I supposed to know they’d get too fat to fly? They are fine though, a few laps outside and they’ll slim right up.”

The gentleman smiled, “An interesting theory, let’s test it.”

He clicked his fingers and Jones felt his midriff expand rapidly. His knees buckled under the weight and he slumped to the ground.

“Off you go then. Chop chop.”


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